Comments for girlicide

Comment on Ultimate Depression by Jose

Jose — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 05:29:35 +0000

When I’m depressed, I pretty much feel the same as you do. I dig myself deeper into my own hole. I isolate myself, not talk to anyone, and just think of worse things as time goes on.

I usually end up sleeping a lot, and then sleeping some more, as if I wanted to be in a Coma for the rest of my life. At least I won’t have worry or decide anything else. Sometimes I can’t sleep more, so I end up listening to depressing / suicidal songs on my bed, until I eventually fall asleep.

I don’t think I’m a suicidal person, but I do think of a lot of ways to die, and how the world would move along without me. It scares me that maybe someday I’ll end up being suicidal after all. So far I don’t swim either for or against the stream, I just let it carry me wherever it goes.

In the end, things don’t really “fix” themselves. Eventually I wake up from my one of my sleep sessions feeling less bad, and then move along like if nothing happened. Nobody really knows what is up with me as I never tell anyone I was feeling down. And then I just carry on letting the stream take me wherever it goes.

I only really talk about this on days I feel better, and usually only with people who I know have been in a similar spot. That’s the only time I really let this out, but maybe never in it’s entire detail. I find that people who have never been in this situation will simply not understand it.

Somehow I feel, so far, we are alike when it comes to this. Which means that if you are writting about it, you are feeling a little better than before, eventhough things really haven’t changed.

Comment on Ultimate Depression by Kristin

Kristin — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 03:03:22 +0000

Holy shit. This made me cry because YES. I have felt that exact same way many many times and I know how it feels and it sucks so bad. Meds make me feel like a zombie as well, and I hate it. I’d rather be sad than not be able to feel ANYTHING. And I can’t fucking stand people telling me to “cheer up and get over it” either. It’s like, “oh thanks, I never thought of trying that before, thanks!” It’s not that simple… People just do. Not. Get. It. Mental illness is so incredibly stigmatized and misunderstood and it makes me sick. I feel your pain, really. I wish I could make it better for you and me and everyone else. :(

Comment on Ultimate Depression by LegallyBoston

LegallyBoston — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 01:47:50 +0000

((hugs)) x endlessly. This kills me to read this Mindy because you’re such a wonderful person and deserve to have many happy days. I’ve been there before so I know how hard things can get. I really hope they get better for you though. ♥

Comment on Ultimate Depression by Heather

Heather — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 03:15:13 +0000

I find it very brave of you to be so raw and honest.
I, like you, have battled depression most of my adult life. I’ve been through the medications, finally gave up on all the meds last November. It seemed pointless anymore.
I guess I want to say, I understand.. wish you didn’t feel so alone, and that you had someone there who could just hold you and not make you feel as if you should force on some happiness. It’s not so simple.
Keep writing, sad or not, it’s good for the soul.
xo

Comment on Ultimate Depression by Meelah

Meelah — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 20:09:13 +0000

Wow, I totally understand your point about people trying to cheer you up, and telling you that it can’t be that bad. I don’t like to give people advice to things I’ve never experienced myself. I’ll throw in a story about an experience I may have had, but I never expect that person to take any advice because each person’s situation is different.

I really do hope things get better for you eventually.

Comment on Ultimate Depression by Christopher

Christopher — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 17:19:08 +0000

Hi Mindy,
I’m going overseas on a military mission and probably won’t be back for quite a while, maybe two years.
I wish that I could send you some energy and get you out of your slump, I would love to help get you on your feet and take you on a trip or get you out of your ’safe zone’ or the surroundings that is adding to you saddness.
You are a great girl :)
I’ve had a great friend that has been going through depression for years now, and I’ve put almost my entire life into helping her and giving her a friend to talk with. I can see that her battle for happiness is inside of herself but I will always be there 100% for her whenever she needs me, I want to be the rock that she can hold on to.
If you ever need a friend e-mail me or whatever and I’ll help you as much as I can.
Well I know that you will pull out of this when you are ready and find your way in life, I have always thought that you were really cool and have lots to offer people,
You look great, You are always very beautiful, smart and funny.
take care of yourself, exercise does wonders for the mind and body,
if I could take you out and have fun and help bring you happiness I would do that, always remember that lot’s of people care about you, even though they may not always be there with you.

christopher

Comment on Ultimate Depression by Clarence

Clarence — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 12:58:58 +0000

Every one of us who have Depression feel your pain to our souls. You are so brave to write about it. I <3 you!

Comment on Ultimate Depression by Cat

Cat — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 10:55:04 +0000

I always find other people find the words to express what I’m feeling when I can’t.
Depression is the most dead end thing I’ve have ever experienced.
I just can’t understand why functioning normally has become a hassle.

And whats worse is when you have the sunny disposition to keep the nagging questions away, they assume you can’t possibly have anything wrong with you…you’re laughing at that point in time. =(

Comment on - NO LONGER A SECRET - by Nicole

Nicole — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 03:41:40 +0000

Ah, the sweet surrender of violence in your dreams. I love my nightmares as well as my dreams. They give me a great grasp on reality. Great read love.

Comment on - NO LONGER A SECRET - by Heather

Heather — Thu, 05 Aug 2010 01:26:06 +0000

This was really awesome to read.